By Jeff Damulira
Marie Mancini saw what distinguished King Louis XIV- his high ideals and romantic nature—thereby, held a mirror to reflect his yearning to be a godlike king—Sun King(48 Laws of Power, 1998). Nevertheless, Marie Mancini was master player in persuasion and influence, since she became King Louis XIV's favourite mistress— she knew how to flatter and boost his levels of confidence. Because, the more we adapt to the ideals, interest or hobbies of the other person, the more influence we will garner in the process. However, it's about intercepting inside the needs and interest of others; therefore, they will feel flattered and delighted to keep us around. For example, It could be even encouraging and uplifting their spirit and mood with words that other people would love to hear and feel good about themselves—like Marie Mancini did with King Louis XIV. Other examples such as learning and mastering their own languages, dress style, traditions, taste in variety of music, films and games. However, There is an broad spectrum to diversify to find some common similarity such as travelling, wine tasting and dancing. Another example is based on personal experience, such as interacting with my friend called Edward, who used to live in Germany. Lo behold, he happens to speak French and German, thereby I made an effort to greet him in both languages and we managed to galvanised mutual smiles. Moreover, it comes down to how much you love studying and spying on humans in general— being a master psychologist in persuasion and influence. By Jeff Damulira
I was having an interesting and brief chat on twitter with Carrie Heinze Musgrove, who is a psychotherapist. The topic was based on helping others too much can be taken for granted. But, it depends on the individual and how much they acknowledge our help. Therefore, if your dealing with someone who is taker and rarely appreciate your help, then it's a wise choice to cut them off. Because, law of reciprocity cannot work without mutual contribution from both party. Therefore, there has to be boundaries and limit, depending on the person your dealing with. Thereby, the law of reciprocity has to be practised with the right people and the right moment; because, trying to please everyone is a recipe of disaster. By Jeff Damulira Despite your socio economic status or circumstances, a consistent act of good deeds will build a strong leverage in the world. Because, the reward could manifest in unexpected winning and luck in different ways. There was a lottery show on this particular guy from the United States who kept giving money to others; then became a millionaire and ended up writing a book on how to win big money in gambling. Although, playing lottery or gambling is not everyone's forte. But, good deeds will always manifest in different forms of rewards. Because, good deeds creates a powerful reaction and responses from people-- which could lead to unexpected gifts and money bestowed on you by others. However, for those with Christian faith and belief, that god said --whoever refreshes others, will also be refreshed. Nevertheless, Consider this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. By Jeff Damulira There is an saying for every actions, there is equal and opposite reaction. But, when we share our financial gains and spend it on others, automatically our aura/electromagnetic spectrum enhances. Hence, there is another saying such as increasing your power; because, generosity strengthens our aura. Therefore, the universe will feel a sense of obligation, even if the money was spent on someone who may not return the favour. But, there is an underlying powerful reaction of generous deed— which makes you feel empowered and enlivened. Therefore, the generosity will create an return of investment of pro social spending. Moreover, I have seen all types of organizations that always give and the return of investment goes beyond such as making tons of profits, huge increase in sales, unexpected funding and sponsorship from other organizations. Another example is someone could be sleeping rough in the street and ends up giving money to someone who has lost money after gambling all his or her money at the casino; then that person receives all kinds of financial luck or other luck in changes in circumstances — by the karmic effect of his generous deed. By Jeff Damulira
Influence and persuasion can be correlation with the meaning of power. But, unfortunately, a lot of people may assume that power is about micromanaging people and being rich ,which is not entirely true. For example, Robert Greene, who is the author of 48 Laws of Power, stated in his interview- that power is all about psychology and not really about money and wealth. It's how you engage and interact with people in the community, that can signify your levels of influence. Because, I have seen people in the community, who wield way more influence, than people earning £50,000 a year or £1million a year. Likewise, Robert Greene even mentioned in 48 Laws of Power on this particular regular guy who gave a free gift to some guard, who later on became king of the country. Thereby, the king of the country was indebted to dude who was considered as a fugitive-since he was exiled. Moreover, he even said, that nobody in Greece has been more generous than the exiled dude and he was never indebted to anyone, but that particular guy. By Jeff Damulira We all know that people are more likely to obey an authority figure. But, the dress style makes a huge difference in signifying the person's status in the society. For example, if a person has graduated out of university with master degree in business administration and he is under dressed; he is less likely to influence people around them in business. But, if that same person with the same credentials happens to wear an three piece tailored suit; he is more likely to influence people around them. Moreover, These are list of titles that can signify a person's authority: -Dr., Prof., Ph.D., President Chairman Founder, CEO, But, clothing can make a huge impact in validating the person's expert and authority status. Nevertheless, there is another effective method of establishing the authority status; which is to write a book. Person who has published a novel or non fictional books is more likely to signify high status in society, Therefore, that person would have some kind of authority in a subject or field. Therefore, he or she is more likely to captivate the crowd/audience or fans. By Jeff Damulira Consistent pro social spending pattern amongst families can build a stronger bond and strengthens the communication with each other. Because, most of our communication is based on non verbal communication. So, subtle activities of pro social spending can signify our appreciation of our beloved ones. However, our beloved ones could be even foster parents and foster grandparents, for those who were adopted since birth. But, an interesting insight of incohesion amongst family members such as loss of communication can stem from the underlying selfishness of the particular individual— it could be family member or colleague. But, when selfishness emerges, the communication dwindles. Therefore, the best way to sustain communication with our beloved ones is to show an act of pro social spending such as buying some small trinket or gift—which can make a huge difference in the communication and rapport building. . By Jeff Damulira There is different types of reciprocation and emotional reciprocation is an unique observation of settling the score. However, emotional reciprocation is based on your ability to make others feel good about themselves. For example, showing as much gratitude and acknowledgement of the other person's contribution or conversations such as pleasured to meet you, nice to meet you and saying thank you very much. Moreover, emotional reciprocation is an powerful arsenal in a realm of persuasion; because other people will feel emotional obliged to return the similar response; although there is takers who may not appreciate the gratitude. But, if you can combine the material or monetary or refreshment as an form of reciprocation with emotional reciprocation—then it becomes a much easier process to influence others. By Jeff Damulira As Robert Cialdini stated that you must not take without giving return. This includes even in social realm of interactions with others such as colleagues or associates. Because, when we feel obliged to do a favour, we would expect some kind of reward or gift. And, if there is no reward in return of the favour, it would be considered as an disequilibrium in the principle of law of reciprocity. Therefore, the person who didn't give anything in return; can be considered as a taker instead of a genuine person— who is willing to return the favour. Furthermore, from personal experiences of living in London, it was inevitably that communication and interactions with takers was an obvious negative outcome of loss of communication. Whereas, the handful of people who were willing to engage in the simple principle of influence such as Law of reciprocity — were able to consolidate a stronger connection. During the campaign of Cambyses in Egypt, a great many Greeks visited that country for one reason or another: some, as was to be expected, for trade, some to serve in the army, others, no doubt, out of mere curiosity, to see what they could see. Amongst the sightseers was Aeaces's son Sylo-son, the exiled brother of Poly crates of Samos. While he was in Egypt, Syloson had an extraordinary stroke of luck: he was hanging about the streets of Memphis dressed in a flame-colored cloak, when Darius, who at that time was a member of Cambyses's guard and not yet of any particular importance, happened to catch sight of him and, seized with a sudden longing to possess the cloak, came up to Syloson and made him an offer for it. His extreme anxiety to get it was obvious enough to Syloson, who was inspired to say: “ I am not selling this for any money, but you must have it, I will give it to you for free.” Darius thereupon thanked him warmly and took it. Syloson at the moment merely thought he had lost it by his foolish good nature; then came the death of Cambyses and the revolt of the seven against the Magus, and Darius ascended the throne. Syloson now had the news that the man whose request for the flame-colored cloak he had formerly gratified in Egypt had become king of Persia. He hurried to Susa, sat down at the entrance of the royal palace, and claimed to be included in the official list of the king's benefactors. The sentry on guard reported his claim to Darius, who asked in surprise who the man might be. “For surely,” he said, “as I have so recently come to the throne, there cannot be any Greek to whom I am indebted for a service. Hardly any of them have been here yet, and I certainly cannot remember owing anything to a Greek. But bring him in all the same, that I may know what he means by this claim. ” The guard escorted Syloson into the royal presence, and when the interpreters asked him who he was and what he had done to justify the statement that he was the king's benefactor, he reminded Darius of the story of the cloak, and said that he was the man who had given it him. “Sir, ” exclaimed Darius, "you are the most generous of men; for while I was still a person of no power or consequence you gave me a present, small indeed, but deserving then as much gratitude from me as would the most splendid of gifts today. I will give you in return more silver and gold than you can count. ”My lord,“ replied Syloson, ”do not give me gold or silver, but recover Samos for me, my native island, which now since Oroetes killed my brother Poly-crates is in the hands of one of our servants. Let Samos be your gift to me, but let no man in the island be killed or enslaved." Darius consented to Syloson's request, and dispatched a force under the command of Otanes, one of the seven, with orders to do everything that Syloson had asked. Credit to Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power
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